As you probably already know by now, in order to promote their new Third Pound Burgers (and to boost sagging sales), McDonald’s has resurrected their famous mascot, the known fast-food sandwich snatcher the Hamburglar. But he’s no longer the chubby, adorable prison-outfitted ex-con thief….
…No, he’s now a live, flesh-and-blood, unshaven hipster burger-swiping thief. Viz, THIS.
What do we at Twinsanity have to say about this? Well, first…
- Mickey D’s must have figured that Ronald McDonald shouldn’t be the only fast-food mascot to creep around the suburbs.
- And you thought that giant plastic headed Burger King was the creepiest mascot around.
- We suspect that he might be Macklemore in disguise.
- This new Hamburglar is a suburban husband and father. Guess he’s been in the Burger Relocation Program all this time.
- How does the Hamburglar manage to afford a home in the ‘burbs and support a family when his only skill is burger-bilking? Does he sell the cheese on the black market? Gotta get that cheddar!
- He looks like he’s guilty of other crimes besides just stealing burgers. We think he’s been doing a lot of Quarter Pounding.
If you think this is bad, you should see McDonald’s plans to revamp Captain Crook.
“AAARRH! The Filet-O-Fish is a succulent seafood sandwich! Ye should buy it or I’ll lop off yer head, drink yer blood an’ plunge yer bones into the depths of Davy Jones Locker!”
Ba-Ba-Ba-Ba-Ba, I’m dreadin’ it!