Cartoon Country: Out Of Fuel

For today’s Cartoon Country, we’ll be venturing into the twisted, demented world of Cartoon Network’s original series, Uncle Grandpa.

Uncle Grandpa

“Good morning!”

The story I’ll be covering today is titled “Out of Fuel”, which is actually a short that aired with the season 2 episode “Uncle Grandpa Retires”, in which Uncle G fills in for the spare tire of his own RV and likes it so much that he wants to keep the job permanently.

WTF

Yeah, you have to have seen the show for that to make sense. Anyway, on with the short. The iconic uncle and grandfather of everyone in the world is on the road with his running crew (Belly Bag, Pizza Steve, Mr. Gus, Giant Realistic Flying Tiger, Tiny Miracle and Frankenstein) playing an epic game of Twister when things go awry.

That’s right; Uncle Grandpa’s RV runs on weirdness rather than gas, so the gang sets out to find some spare weirdness in The Big City.

The_Gang_Tiny_Miracle_and_Frankenstein_in_Out_of_Fuel_25

 

So to recap, these guys…

Uncle Grandpa & Friends…THESE GUYS…

…don’t know where they can find a source of weirdness to fuel the RV, so they search The Big City trying to find some. After a few minutes of shtick, they eventually come to the conclusion…

Glinda the Good Witch

“They had the weirdness with them all along!”

With this new found revelation, UG extracts some weirdness from his buddies

UG - Out of Fuel

 

which results in them nearly getting sucked into a vortex. However, Uncle G does manage to snag a small piece of the weird aura and uses it to finally fuel the RV. It’s here where he delivers the coup de grace: He says:

ug_unclegrandpa_180x180

“With a piece of weirdness this small, the RV can only run for another 10,000 years. Maybe 20,000 if we rotate the wipers regularly.”

WTF

And that was “Out of Fuel”. Now, the surreal nuttiness of Uncle Grandpa is an acquired taste. You’re either going to enjoy it or you just won’t. One of the biggest complaints that I’ve heard regarding UG is that the series lacks depth and heart, in response to this, I would ask these people “Why are you expecting depth and heart on a cartoon called Uncle Grandpa? The show is precisely what it is. Either accept it for what it is or don’t deal with it at all. It’s not complex. I’ve always enjoyed kooky, wacky humor and for some reason, I like the idea of a vehicle that runs solely on weirdness. Why are we wasting are time burning gasoline when we should just start traveling with a weirdo or two?

Mudman_zpsyv6md9do

“PREACH, BROTHA, PREACH!!!”

Cartoon Country: Critical Condition

HAPPY 2018, EVERYBODY!

Happy-New-Year-Images-2018-HD-1-1

Slappysquirrel

“Eh, put a sock in it!”

A new year means new Twinsanity craziness. Let’s kick off 2018 with a Cartoon Country focusing on one of my favorite Silver Age Warner Bros. characters, Animaniacs‘ old-school (really old) toon great Slappy Squirrel.

Slappy Squirrel Title Card

“Thaaaat’s Slappyyyy!”

First, a little back story: I originally planned to showcase 2 of my favorite Slappy Squirrel shorts as part of a What The Funny miniseries I was going to do for New Looney Tunes last year (why insert Slappy into New Looney Tunes? I’ll get to that), but I was unable to go ahead with that for various reasons, not the least of which being that Cartoon Network and Boomerang for whatever reason opted not to air New Looney Tunes on either of their channels in the States, so I decided to just break down the 2 Slappy shorts individually as Cartoon Countries instead.

recycle-symbol-symbol-logo

Waste not, want not.

However, I still hold on to the hope that I can one day do a New Looney Tunes What The Funny somewhere down the line. Now that we’ve got that out of the way, on with the fun!

The Slappy short we’ll be looking at today is Critical Condition.

CriticalCondition

Premise: Slappy gets roasted by famous critics Lean Hiskel and Codger Eggbert (no prizes for guessing who these guys are based on), and sets out to make a counterpoint in her own inimitable fashion.

Critical Condition 3

The short begins with Slappy and her nephew Skippy watching a broadcast of Hiskel & Eggbert as they review a Laser Disc…

Memba This

‘Memba Those?

…entitled The Best of Looney Tunes, which features famous WB shorts that the show can run clips of since they’re all owned by the same parent company. This compilation also includes some of Slappy’s old shorts.

“There I am. Look at my head!”

Critical Condition 8

I always liked how in-universe Slappy Squirrel is a Looney Tune alongside Bugs, Daffy, Porky et al. Warner probably has no interest in doing this, but I think it would be cool if for the new Animaniacs series set to air on Hulu in 2020, they would produce some specially made ‘vintage’ Slappy shorts, similar to the “He’s Bonkers!” shorts that Disney made for Raw Toonage, just so we could see what kind of cartoons Slappy starred in within this revisionist history.

 

Among the cartoons highlighted are:

whatsoperadoc

What’s Opera, Doc?

Duck_Amuck

Duck Amuck

PorkyMeetsDodo

…And Porky in Wackyland.

-The critics are yukking it up at these clips. While Skippy is just happy that they’re happy, Slappy wants to know when they’re going to get to her cartoons. They do, but unfortunately, Lean and Codger consider Slappy to be “the only Looney Tunes star [they] actually hate”, labeling her “tremendously unfunny”.

Critical Condition 12

“WHAT???!!!???”

One bit I like is how whenever the critics insult Slappy on screen, Slappy herself takes a hit, literally.

“She’s just not funny!”

bam-comic-word-wording-sound-effect-set-design-background-strip-47728396

“She never made a funny cartoon in her life!”

bop-sound-effect

“Let’s face it: Slappy Squirrel is the UN-FUNNIEST cartoon character of all time!”

kaboom-wording-sound-effect-comic-speech-bubble-62992475

Critical Condition 4

After recovering from that ego-bruising, Slappy and Skippy regroup to make their response. Slappy offers these words of advice:

Critical Condition 11

“If you wanna go on TV and shred someone’s career to pieces, you have the right to do that, but if you’re gonna do that, don’t go leaving your names and addresses in the phone book!” Before proceeding to destroy the critics’ home with a giant missle.

Critical Condition 7

Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on your point of view), the critics were away getting their legs waxed and weren’t home for the explosion, but they will be attending the premiere of Steven Spielberg’s new movie. So the squirrels decide to take in a flick.

Shirley-AnimaniacsCameo

TINY TOONS CAMEO! Shirley the Loon is attending the premiering with her namesake, Shirley MacLaine.

Slappy and Skippy infiltrate the theater and proceed to give the critics the works. First by impersonating ushers who refuse to let them in, with Skippy even laying them out with karate. They finally get past him with a HUGE bribe. Then we get this exchange:

Critical Condition 6

Slappy: Congratulations, Skippy. You just paid for your college education.

Skippy: College, nothin’. I’m goin’ to Vegas!

Slappy: (without missing a beat) Get me Sigfried and Roy’s autograph, will ya?

After further chicanery, including Slappy at the concession stand treating Eggbert to a (literal) tub of popcorn (“Here ya go, Shamu!”) and buttering it with lard from Eggbert’s gut(!)…

Critical Condition 2

…And showing the critics to their seats…located inside a huge rocket…

Critical Condition 5

Slappy finally lets a fuming Hiskel and Eggbert into the theater to see Spielberg’s new movie…

Jurassic-park-2-1024

…Which was totally NOT Jurassic Park, Spielberg’s latest film at the time…

Only for the squirrels to trap them inside the film (I love cartoons!) where they’re chased by a predatory T-Rex, but no worries, the other giant missle fired by Slappy gets to them first.

Afterward, on their next show, Hiskel and Eggbert (in bandages and casts) officially retract their original critique of Slappy, completely changing their tune (or at least too traumatized to want to make any more waves), and proclaim her “the funniest cartoon character of all time”, right before Skippy blasts them with TNT into a hole, just to keep things from getting too treacly.

Slappy_on_Halloween

“Now that’s comedy!”

-“Critical Condition” isn’t deep or layered in any way; it’s plot is simple: some critics rip on Slappy, and Slappy retaliates…hard…but the gags and wisecracks in this short are top-notch, which is why this has always been on of my all-time favorite Slappy Squirrel shorts.

Critical Condition 10

We give it 2 toes up!

Cartoon Country: New Looney Tunes

Just when you thought it was safe to return to Twinsanity…..

CARTOON COUNTRY RETURNS!!!

Bender Applause

We’re back, baby!

Today’s Cartoon Country is all about a show I’m grooving on right now: New Looney Tunes.

New_Looney_Tunes_Square

For the uninformed, New Looney Tunes began as Wabbit: A Looney Tunes Production. Stylized as wabbit. and known also as bugs! in parts of Europe, the Middle East and Japan, Wabbit is/was an American animated television series from Warner Bros. Animation. The series premiered on September 21, 2015, on Cartoon Network, and later premiered on October 5, 2015, on Boomerang. Eventually, the series was rechristened New Looney Tunes and its’ universe was expanded to include the rest of the Looney Tunes gang.

I probably don’t need to say this anymore, but like all of the Cartoon Countries, this isn’t a review; I won’t be breaking down any of the show’s specific episodes, for the simple fact that I can’t; currently the series isn’t airing anywhere in the US (on March 7, 2017, Turner and Warner Bros. announced that the unaired episodes will be released on Boomerang’s SVOD service, but there doesn’t seem to have been any follow-up to that), so I’ve only caught sporadic glimpses of New Looney Tunes, much to my chagrin. (Fun Fact: I had originally planned to examine New Looney Tunes as a What The Funny, but was unable to due to the lack of resources, references, clips, stills and information available.) Instead, I’ll just be giving a brief overview of the show and my views and opinions on it.

The series returns to its’ slapstick roots. This is a good thing, as physical comedy was something NLT’s predecessor, The Looney Tunes Show, was sorely lacking. FTR, I thought The Looney Tunes Show was just so-so; I didn’t hate it like so many other people on the internet, but I’ll openly admit that it wasn’t what I wanted from a new Looney Tunes series. Intro time. (I know I showed this here once already, but it makes me happy, so here it is again:)

Each episode of Wabbit contained two shorts, starring Bugs Bunny as the main character. When the show transitioned to New Looney Tunes, each thirty-minute episode contains four shorts, with Bugs Bunny as the main character. In the show, Bugs confronts other characters from the Looney Tunes shorts, as well as some new friends and enemies.

Some characters are given new traits. For example:

wabbit wile e coyote

Wile E. Coyote is Bugs’ pompous, smart-alecky, technology-obsessed neighbor, whose desert expanse is separated from Bugs’ forest rabbit hole setting by a single wooden fence. His ‘vast intellect’ and obsession with the latest gizmos always loses out to Bugs’ simple wise-ass cunning.

elmerfudd

Elmer Fudd returns, and about time too, I say. Elmer was barely featured on The Looney Tunes Show and I thought it was weird how in this new series which stars Bugs Bunny and whose title is in ‘Elmer Fudd-ese’, didn’t feature the character until now, but Fudd is back, and he’s still no match for Bugs.

wabbit taz

Taz here (in what as far as I know is his only appearance in the series so far) is ‘Theodore Tasmanian’, employed as an accountant who tries to repress his savage nature.

OK, this take on Taz is a bit weird. It’s funny to hear Taz speaking full sentences, but it’s just kind of strange. I’m not sure if the show will keep Taz in this guise for future episodes, but I’m sure fans like this more than Taz being a pet like he was in TLTS. (Though to be fair, I didn’t think that was a bad idea either, I just wouldn’t have made him Bugs’ pet, as animals keeping other animals as pets is just weird and kind of…wrong somehow. I’d have given Taz to Granny or something.)

There are also new characters (Yes! I’m glad that the producers are mixing things up and adding new characters into the fray rather than just relying on old formulas), such as Squeaks the Squirrel, whose nonsensical chattering is provided by Dee Bradley Baker…

wabbit_squeaks

wabbit bugs and bigfoot

…And the weakest character in my opinion, Bigfoot, a childlike, mindlessly destructive and very, very, very stupid Sasquatch who routinely calls Bugs “Lady”. I don’t find Bigfoot especially funny, but it is good that the producers aren’t afraid to knock Bugs around a little; this keeps him from becoming smug and too perfect to be interesting.

And then we come to Daffy. Insane. Unhinged. Totally nuts. Woo-hoo-ing all over the place.

wabbit daffy and porky

And this is my reaction.

smiley-faces

THANK YOU! I’ve already elaborated on this in Unpopular Opinions, but I am SO glad to see Daffy Duck being a nut-job again instead of a greedy, selfish, cowardly a-hole! This series gets my respect just for bringing my favorite take on my favorite Looney Tune back!

wabbit bugs and sam

Now, with the slapstick comedy back, Bugs back in the rabbit hole, Sam having his guns again and Elmer antagonizing Bugs again, you’d think fans would be happy….

Belushi But No

But NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Of course, people still have to look for trivial reasons to bitch, whine and moan about this show. The prevalent complaint I hear about this series is the characters’ designs; people think they look ‘weird”. I actually heard this statement uttered about the show’s aesthetic choices:

assy_400x400

“Why can’t we get a series where the characters look ‘the normal way’?

“The normal way?”

Madea Shut Up

First, we FINALLY get a Looney Tunes show where the characters are acting loony again, and now you’re complaining about the designs? Second, what’s “the normal way”? How are we defining “normal” here? You know every artist has their own style, right? There has NEVER been one specific way to design these or any characters.

Bugs_Bunny

Heck, even the Termite Terrace directors each had their own sets of artists: Friz Freleng’s Bugs looked different from Tex Avery’s Bugs who looked different from Chuck Jones’ Bugs who looked different from Robert McKimson’s Bugs. As long as the characters are still recognizable as who they’re supposed to be, what’s the problem?

Foghorn_Leghorn_in_Wabbit

Granted, that face on Foghorn is a little weird…

wabbit yosemite sam

…And Yosemite Sam looks like he escaped from the Ren & Stimpy Show. Still, you recognize that it’s Yosemite Sam, so I don’t see what the big deal is.

Porky_Pig

And for those who are asking, “Why is Porky so fat here?”….

Early Porky Pig

…This is closer to how he looked originally.

Also, curiously absent from the fun (so far) is Lola Bunny. If she were to show up, one wonders if we’ll get something closer to the Space Jam version…

Lola_Bunny 1

…Or the Looney Tunes Show version.

LolaBunny

And no, I’m NOT opening that can of worms again. We’re not going to launch that tired debate about which version of Lola is better. Here’s my answer to that question:

Squidward_Meme_-_Nobody_Cares

Seriously, that argument is so old it’s growing mold! As long as Lola is A) funny and B) an actual character, not just some secondary love interest or some hyper-competent “I don’t need no man”, cipher-like embodiment of Girl Power (TM) or some den mother whose only job is to remind the boys how dumb they’re being, I’m fine with her portrayal.

In summation, I’m liking what I’ve seen so far of New Looney Tunes, and I’m hoping the show will come back to the States in full capacity so I can rake in some good old-mixed-with-new style cartoon cool.

wabbit bugs and squeaks

Grab yourself some crunchy carrots and enjoy the show!

Cartoon Country: Krillin VS Pintar

Before I start, I’d like to once again apologize for the low output here lately. We’re not happy about it either, but we’ve been working on evolving the site in various ways (most of which we’ve already covered previously, so there’s no need to repeat ourselves)  and things are indeed beginning to happen, so thanks for sticking with us during this time.  OK, enough of that, on with the nonsense.

Today we’ll be looking at one of my favorite moments from Dragon Ball Z, focusing on everyone’s favorite short stack, Krillin.

Krillin

“Mondo cool!”

In this scene, Krillin is competing in one of the many, many, many fighting Tenkaichi Budokai fighting tournaments present in the DBZ universe. Krillin is sporting hair on his head because by this time in the series, he hasn’t fought in a while and has been instead doing the family thing with his wife Android #18 and their young daughter Marron. Anyways, Krillin’s opponent is a mountainous blowhard named Pintar (a pun on pinto beans, maybe?). There is a noticeable size, height and weight difference between the two combatants, and for this reason, Pintar immediately begins relentlessly taunting Krillin for being vertically challenged. Then the match starts and this happens:

Yep, that’s right; Krillin plants one in Pintar’s bread basket, knocking the big schmo out of the ring with a single punch, thereby winning the match by a TKO.

One thing that I like about this moment is that while Pintar relentlessly taunts Krillin both before and at the start of the match, Krillin never once engages Pintar personally. We hear some of his inner thoughts, but Krillin never says a single thing directly to the guy, and as we learn later on, there was no need for him to; he let his fist do the talking for him. For all of his bluster and trash talk, Pintar never lays a finger on Krillin. The match doesn’t even last three minutes. And after he’s declared the victor, Krillin just turns and walks away, as if to say this match was just another thing that happened. Speaking as someone who is shorter than the average guy (5′, 6″, in case you were wondering), I liked seeing ol’ Krillin get a moment of superiority for a change. I’m sure that fans have different interpretations/opinions regarding this scene, but for me, this is right up there with the “Hulk owns Loki” moment in the Avengers movie. It’s just like what Buster Bunny is wont to say:

Buster Bunny

“Never underestimate the little guy!”

Cartoon Country: Bionic Six

Today I’ll be looking back at a largely forgotten but interesting cartoon from the late 1980s, Bionic Six.

bionic-six-team

Just hangin’ out with the family, busting bad guys’ heads…

Bionic Six is an American-Japanese animated television series that aired from 1987 to 1989. It was produced by TMS Entertainment (which had previously worked on Dokonjō Gaeru and Hasbro’s Visionaries: Knights of the Magical Light) and distributed, through first-run syndication, by MCA TV, years before the latter company became NBCUniversal Television Distribution. Renowned Japanese animation director Osamu Dezaki was involved as chief supervising director, and his distinctive style (as seen in Golgo 13 and Cobra) is evident throughout all its episodes.

The title characters of the series are a family of machine-enhanced human beings possessing unique powers after being augmented with bionic technology. Each family member is given specific bionic powers, and thus they form a superhero team called the Bionic Six.

Here’s the show’s intro:

 

slappy-squirrel

“That’s nice singing. They remind me of Up With People.”

In the near future (some unspecified decades after 1999), Professor Dr. Amadeus Sharp Ph.D., head of the Special Projects Labs (SPL), creates a new form of technology to augment humans through bionics. His first subject was Jack Bennett, a test pilot who secretly acted as Sharp’s field agent, Bionic-1. On a family ski vacation in the Himalayas, an alien spacecraft triggers an avalanche that buries the entire family, exposing them to the unusual radiation of a mysterious buried object. Jack frees himself but discovers his family in a comatose state. Theorizing that Jack’s bionics protected him from the radiation, Professor Sharp implants bionic technology in the others, awakening them. Afterward, the family operates incognito as a publicly lauded team of adventuring superheroes, the Bionic Six.

The Bennett family includes patriarch Jack, matriarch Helen, Eric, Meg, J.D., and Bunji. They live in a secluded oceanfront home in the fictional city of Cypress Cove, in northern California. Each member wears a special ring and a “wristcomp” (a mini-computer hardwired into the wrist), which they use to activate their bionic powers. The Bionic Six can also combine their powers by joining hands, creating a “Bionic Link” to amplify their abilities

The Bennett Family/Bionic Six

bionic-six-bennet-family

Jack Bennett/Bionic-1 (voiced by John Stephenson): Expert test pilot. Bionic-1’s powers are mostly related to his bionic eyes (including “x-ray vision,” telescopic sight, energy blasts, and low-powered beams that temporarily cause electronic devices to malfunction or even turn against their users), and enhanced hearing (this last capability beyond even the powers of the other team members, who each possess superhuman levels of hearing in their own right).

Helen Bennett/Mother-1 (voiced by Carol Bilger): Jack’s wife, and oceanographer and marine biologist. Mother-1 possesses various ESP powers that allow her to occasionally see glimpses of the future, telepathically communicate with other sentient and non-sentient beings, determine the function and operation of mechanical devices by mentally “tracing” their internal workings, and can mentally project hologram-like optical illusions. She is also an accomplished fighter, having bested Dr. Scarab’s henchwoman Madame-O on the occasions when the two physically fought each other one-on-one.

Eric Bennett/Sport-1 (voiced by Hal Rayle): Jack and Helen’s athletic son. At local Albert Einstein High School, Eric is a shortstop on the baseball team, the Einstein Atoms. He routinely employs baseball vernacular in his dialogue. As Sport-1, he affects electromagnetic powers to attract or repel metallic objects with tremendous force, meld them together, or even rip them apart. This force is directional and – by varying the configuration of his hands, or by using one or both arms – Sport-1 can adjust the strength of attraction or repulsion. He can also use objects as he would a baseball bat, including steel beams, lampposts and other objects (including baseball bats) to redirect incoming objects and energy blasts; infused by the same field that comes from his arms, he can use those ordinarily fragile objects to hit and deflect things they normally could not. (In one instance, he used a steel beam to hit an incoming asteroid.)

Meg Bennett/Rock-1 (voiced by Bobbi Block):  Jack and Helen’s daughter and Eric’s younger sister. Meg is an excitable and somewhat ditsy teen who loves music. She is prone to habitual use of the future-slang phrase “So-LAR!” (comparable to “awesome”), as well as the prefixes “Mega-!” (as befitting her first name) and “Ultra-!” . As Rock-1, she can emit sonic beams from blaster units mounted on her shoulders – the blaster units are only visible when she assumes “bionic mode.” She can also run at blinding speeds, faster than other members of the team. (These can all run at superhuman speeds in their own right, though nowhere near as fast as she can.) Meg and her brother Eric are Jack’s and Helen’s sole biological offspring.

J.D. Bennett/IQ (voiced by Norman Bernard): Jack’s and Helen’s remarkably intelligent, adopted African-American son. As IQ, he has both super-human strength (he is even stronger than the other members of the team with super-human strength, making him the strongest member of the team) and super-intelligence. So this kid’s not only the brains of the team, but also the muscle? No ego problems there.

Bunjiro “Bunji” Bennett/Karate-1 (voiced by Brian Tochi): Jack and Helen’s Japanese foster son. He was placed under their guardianship after his own father disappeared 10 years earlier somewhere in the East. Bunji is an avid karate enthusiast. As Karate-1, he has enhanced martial arts skills, made more formidable when applying his bionics. As such, his agility levels surpasses that of his teammates, and his reflexes are among the sharpest, and only Rock-1’s reflexes surpass his, due to her super-speed.

F.L.U.F.F.I. (voiced by Neil Ross): a gorilla-like robot who lives as a housekeeper with the Bennetts. He regularly demonstrates a comical craving for aluminum cans that extends to casually devouring the Bennetts’s cookware, vehicles, or other metal objects. Despite his bungling behavior, he nonetheless proves helpful around the Bennett home, or assisting the Bionic Six with physical tasks in the field.

That’s an eclectic group, to say the least.

skittles-rainbow

Taste the Rainbow!

Trivia Time: In the German dub of Bionic Six, Bionic-1 and IQ were the only main characters to keep their original names. In Germany, Mother-1 is known as Bionic-2, Sport-1 is Baseball, Rock-1 is Rock and Roll and Karate-1 is Kamikaze.

Of course, with heroes comes the motley crew of villains (gotta sell those action figures, you know!)

The Villains 

Dr. Scarab: real name Dr. Wilmer Sharp Ph.D., who is Amadeus Sharp’s brother. Scarab is a hefty, egotistically brilliant and occasionally comical man who yearns for the secret to eternal life and world domination. His right eye has been modified with a monocle that has a low-powered scanner that can detect individuals with bionics, even when they are disguised, and a destructive, high-powered beam. In rare instances throughout the series, he seemingly demonstrates superhuman, bionic strength of his own (on at least one occasion, he picked up Mother-One effortlessly and threw her around; in another instance, he was seen carrying as much solid gold out of Fort Knox as his other bionic minions–several hundred pounds’ worth.)He was voiced by Jim MacGeorge, who imitated the voice of George C. Scott when providing that character voice.

dr-scarab

The doctor is in…sane!

Dr. Scarab has assembled a motley team of henchmen (described below), imbued with an apparently lesser form of the same bionic powers employed by the Bionic Six. (Another one of Scarab’s goals in the series is to try to figure out the secrets behind his brother’s superior bionics knowledge.)

team-scarab

“HAIL HYDRA!!….No, wait. ..COBRA!!!…No, that’s not it either….HAIL SCARAB!! Yeah, that’s the ticket!”

Glove is a purple-skinned villain named for his left-handed blaster glove which is capable of firing both beams and projectiles. He serves as the field leader in Scarab’s evil plans (hence made a frequent target for punishment for failures) and constantly vies to replace Dr. Scarab as leader.

300px-starscreamg1

“hey, bud. I like your style!”

 

Although cunning and vicious, he tends to retreat at the first sign of defeat. His strength varies, as in some instances, he seems to be the equal of Bionic-1, while in one instance, he was able to physically overpower and dominate both Bionic-1 and Karate-1 at the same time. Glove was voiced by Frank Welker.

Madame-O is an enigmatic blue-skinned femme fatale who wears a full face mask and uses a harp-like weapon to fire sonic blasts. She has a verbal tic of ending many of her statements with the word “…darling.” While possessing super strength, she is not as strong as many of the other characters; Mother-1 was able to defeat her in physical struggles in various occasions. Before her transformation, she actually appeared to be an elderly woman. She was voiced by Jennifer Darling.

Mechanic is a dim-witted, childish brute who employs various mechanical tools as weapons – nail or rivet guns, throwing circular saw blades, using a large wrench as a bludgeon. Despite his short temper, he has a soft spot for animals and an engrossing fondness for (in-universe) children’s television cartoons. He was voiced by Frank Welker.

Chopper is a chain-wielding thug who articulates sounds mimicking a revving motorcycle. He is sometimes depicted riding a three-wheeled motorcycle vehicle. He, like both Mechanic and Glove, was voiced by Frank Welker. Coincidentally (or perhaps not), Frank Welker previously voiced another character named Chopper with exactly the same voice and “vocal mannerisms,” in a 1970s-era cartoon titled Wheelie and the Chopper Bunch.

chopper

Is it possible that this guy was able to undergo some sort of trans-species surgery? Who knows?

Klunk (voiced like Bionic-1 by John Stephenson) is a patchwork monstrosity who appears to be made of living glue, and who rarely speaks coherently. Immediately after his creation, Scarab noted to himself to “use a little less power next time.”While relatively unintelligent, he is considered one of the most dangerous opponents to engage in battle with, due to his unparalleled strength (his strength appears to surpass even that of I.Q, the strongest member of the Bionic Six), high resistance to physical attacks, and his gooey body’s ability to engulf his opponent – even Dr. Scarab fears him to some extent. Unlike the other minions of Dr. Scarab, he is (understandably) horrified by his own transformation and longs to be human again. Regarding Klunk’s appearance, I can’t put it any better than Red Dwarf‘s Cat:

Danny-John-Jules.jpg

“He looks like something that dropped out of the Sphinx’s nose!”

Bionic Six‘s episode structure followed the rather predictable route: Bad guys cause trouble, good guys use their super powers to stop them. Bad guys vow that they’ll whup their butts next time. Wash, rinse, repeat. Furthermore, this was one of those shows where no one was ever able to make the connection that the Bennett family and the Bionic Six were one and the same, despite the fact that the Six’s super hero costumes didn’t cover their faces at all! “They were a nuclear family with two whites, a black and an Asian child, but that could have been anybody! You know how common those are!” In one episode, Eric (Sport-1) is on a date with a girl, Scarab causes some trouble where Eric and his date are, he excuses himself and returns as Sport-1 and his date asks “What happened to Eric?”

picard-facepalm

Oh, come on! How could she not know that was Eric? Same hair! Same face! Same voice! He didn’t even take off his baseball cap! The Power Rangers at least wore helmets, fer cryin’ out loud!  The ordinary citizens of Cypress Cove must have all been either nearsighted or very stupid.

Another thing that I liked about Bionic Six is how, like the Fantastic Four before them, the Bennetts were an actual family. They weren’t put together like other teams. The were related, so they’d be living together and were dealing with one another even before they were given bionic super powers. Also, and this is something that I touched upon back in my CC post for Miles From Tomorrowland, I like how Mother-1 (Jack’s wife Helen) was a full fledged member of the team. She wasn’t just the secretary or something lame like that. Helen was a career woman and an equal member of the team. She didn’t just stay home and make dinner while her husband and kids were off saving the world, nor was she conspicuously absent for no reason (in your face, Transformers Rescue Bots!). The main thing about the show that I don’t particularly agree with (aside from the kids being 3 boys and only 1 girl) is that I don’t think that J.D. (IQ) needed to be the physically strongest member of the team. Having off-the-charts super genius intelligence is super power enough. If the writers wanted J.D. to have some visually stunning effect, just have him do the occasional brain blast or something like that.

Bionic Six only ran for one full season in syndication, but the series did spawn a line of action figures, so there’s that.

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One thing that the Bionic Six was lacking, however, was their own flying HQ. The Helicarrier remains awesome!